Domestic Violence Myths: Helping the Abused not the Abuser

26 Oct

Domestic ViolenceOctober is the National Domestic Violence Month. It is the time when people and communities gather around to raise the awareness on the daily battle against domestic violence on women and children. You see on the news that the statistics are really shocking. One in four women in the United States has been a victim of domestic abuse by her husband or intimate partner, one in five women is being raped and one in six women is being stalked. If you experience any type of abuse, you may consult with a domestic violence lawyer as soon as possible.

A report last year highlighted the impact of domestic violence, sexual violence and stalking will have on women. Studies showed that women who experienced domestic violence had higher risk in obtaining long-term health problems. The health problems may include irritable bowel, frequent headaches, diabetes, chronic pain and sleeping difficulties. And almost twice as many females who were the victims of abuse reported to have asthma, compared to the females who never reported to experience violence at all.

These reported high rates, still increasing, domestic abuses on women and its long-term impact to the abused women lives make Domestic Violence Awareness movement curated to help reduce and eliminate the scourging of domestic violence in all countries. The myths relating to domestic abuse have persisted many years ago. The following are the most prevalent myths and their counterparts – the real facts. This was made to educate those individuals who failed to recognize the violence itself and help end the critical cycle.

(1.) Domestic abuses only occur in uneducated, less fortunate and minority families.

Truth: There are lots of studies that are made to show that battering and physical abuse does not only occur in minority families. It happens in all types of families regardless of education, income, race, region and ethnicity. Women are equally abused by their intimate partner despite their race. Most of the time, women with lower annual income are most likely to experience abuse. It is also important to note that those individuals who have limited resources are the ones who report most incidents of violence.

(2.) Stress, drug and alcohol abuse can cause domestic violence.

Truth: Lots of abusers also abuse drugs and alcohol but they are not the main cause of domestic abuses, they are just excuses. Most of these abusers often consume alcohol or drugs to displace their violence through the intoxication. Then, blame the alcohol for the physical harm he inflicted on his partner. To stop the violence, one needs to consult an expert counsel to address both of the abuses separately, as the abused of alcohol or drugs have different treatment under the law.

(3.) The victims don’t need or accept help, so why care?

Truth: The victim’s lack of confidence to leave is one of the many reasons why domestic violence still occur. Abusers have special tactic in isolating their victims from their family and friends so the victims can’t ask help from the outside. Studies show that persistent violence could be avoided when there is somebody who cares from a family or friend, help the victim to have a safer way of escape.

(4.) Abused women often provoke the violence

Domestic Violence Reality

Truth: It is absolutely wrong when we focused on the victims behavior rather than on the abuser’s responsibility for the violence. When couples are having a relationship problem, or have relationships with difficult individuals, no one will respond with violence. Because no one asks for the abuse nor deserves a violence. In domestic violence episode and the woman is blamed to have caused or provoked the partner to demonstrate the abuse, this is very wrong. Domestic violence does not happen in one single situation. It goes in cycles and still repeating when not stopped by the victim herself.

The above are some of the myths why domestic violence happened. It is not with the victim or a drug or alcohol that push a person to do the abuse. It certainly lies on the person, the individual who demonstrates physical violence. Whoever he is, he is the problem. When this happens to you and to your loved one, contact Domestic violence lawyer.


About the Author

Attorney Soldan deals with a huge array of criminal and civil cases in the northern Virginia region. He litigates in local courts including cities of Fredericksburg, Alexandria, Leesburg, Vienna, and Warrenton.

Aside from being a Domestic violence lawyer, he also focuses scenarios involving Driving under the influence, Gun Charges, Robbery, Reckless Driving and Drug Charges. For more details you can drop him a mail at Follow him on Twitter @vacrimattorney.


Posted by on October 26, 2012 in Domestic Violence


2 responses to “Domestic Violence Myths: Helping the Abused not the Abuser

  1. Becki Duckworth

    October 26, 2012 at 5:26 am

    I was a victim of Domestic Violence as well attacked and stabbed 21 years in front of my sons age 6 and 2. I recently left a very successful career to focus on a blog and write a story that one day hope to have published.

  2. Thomas S.

    November 8, 2012 at 9:03 am

    Becki I’m so sorry about what you’ve gone through. I was very frustrated to hear that. I am hoping that you are just okay right now. I can see how you diverted your focus on creating a very interesting blog. Your stories are heard and you are no longer alone. Keep it up! Continue to inspire us.


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